Change is a normal part of growth. Anything that isn’t changing and constantly moving forward is stagnating; this is especially true in marriage. Everyone experiences a time of transition when they get married, but some couples find that the change from single life to married life is more of a struggle than they expected. When both parties are at an impasse and neither can agree on basic issues, God’s Word gives the answers on how to make this relationship succeed.

Adjusting to a new life with a spouse can be unsettling because old habits that have become ingrained are hard to change. Changing means moving forward into the unknown; that’s scary for a lot of us. However, we don’t have to be afraid to embrace change. Asking Jesus Christ to be in the center of our marriage gives us the stability we need; that’s something that will never change. “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever” (Hebrews 13:8, NKJV).

Both parties face the challenge of getting accustomed to everyday issues like handling money, setting up housekeeping, and relating to the in-laws. This can be a source of friction not only for newlyweds, but also for couples who have been married for decades. To stay centered and properly focused, we should realize that God, Himself, created the institution of marriage as a holy union. “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). Truly successful marriages are the ones built with God’s Word as the foundation.

It’s important to remember that none of us are perfect, and that we all make mistakes. When two people are living together, sometimes those mistakes seem larger and more significant than they really are. God loves and accepts us unconditionally. We show godly love when we display that same attitude toward our spouse. “Above all things have intense and unfailing love for one another, for love covers a multitude of sins [forgives and disregards the offenses of others]” (1 Peter 4:8, AMPC).

A happy marriage is a gift from God, and it’s one way He shows His love for us. God’s love goes beyond emotions and feelings—it’s actually a conscious decision we make. “Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails…” (1 Corinthians 13:4-8, NKJV). This isn’t always easy to do on an everyday basis, but it can be done with help and guidance from the Holy Spirit.

Successful marriages take plenty of work. When we factor in kids, extracurricular activities, careers, housework, shopping, and all the other things that go along with family life, the amount of stress on the relationship can either damage it or make it stronger. Daily life together won’t always feel perfect, but families who put God first have a tremendous advantage over families who don’t. “Commit your actions to the LORD, and your plans will succeed” (Proverbs 16:3, NLT). Whatever changes and challenges come our way, God is the key to weathering them successfully.

For more on how the basics of a godly marriage can take it to the next level, click on the link below to find the single message, Life Talks: Marriage Mechanics, in our eStore.